I still have two or three months before I will officially be a SAHM (hiring and training a replacement takes a while), but today has become a test run. Wyatt is cutting both of his top “eye” teeth, and they are really being tough on him. He has been running a low fever on and off, snotty nose, and been in pain a good bit. He wasn’t himself when he woke up this morning, so I decided that daycare was a no-go today.
Since Wyatt wasn’t going to school and I wasn’t going to work, it wasn’t hard for Zander to convince me to pick him up early from his last day of Kindergarten. So, it seems that we are having a trial run of this staying-at-home-with-the-kids thing.
Since we were already in the car from dropping off Zander at school, Wyatt and I headed to the park next to the river to eat a bite of breakfast and enjoy the coolness of the morning. We picked a picnic table and shared a biscuit while waving to every vehicle that passed by. (Since this particular park is next to a pretty busy road, that was a LOT of waving.)
Once we had nibbled the biscuit away, we each took our drinks (coffee for me, water for him) and walked to the river for a closer look. I watched the joy on his face as he waved to the water from different points of the railing. I watched his fascination with even the most common things. I learned that my little boy LOVES watching bugs.
In that moment, I realized what a gift I have been given. It feels like I’m on candid camera, waiting for the big “gotcha” moment. It’s just not possible that I’m going to be allowed to trade a full-time job for housework and walks in the park. (I know that I have my rose-colored glasses on right now, but just go with me here…)
It’s not that I don’t understand that staying at home is still a LOT of work. I won’t have more work, but I will DO more work. I am not under the illusion that I will suddenly have 40 extra hours in the week for leisure and play. I understand all of that, but I still feel like I’m going on an extended vacation.
I will be at home when my husband is off work instead of being at the office two out of his three off days each week. I will be able to spend time watching my boys grow. I will be the person that teaches Wyatt his alphabet and numbers, shapes and colors. I will share more than an hour in the morning and a couple of hours in the evening with my sons. I will not be so spent when I am with them that I am short tempered and impatient.
I am so blessed to be allowed the privilege of being a full-time wife and mother. Although I still have several weeks before it starts, my heart is light in anticipation of another walk in the park.